It'll be just like starting over

Today is the first time I've even looked at this old blog since my last post of April 1, which means this is the first time I've seen the last comment left by Deeziner. Thanks, by the way.

And her comment only underlines how sad everything turned out. It was a giddy, happy time all those months ago. We were all excited to be going back to Listverse Forums again, and it was all going so well.

Until...

I don't blame dangorironhide for deleting my profile (and therefore all my posts). I've never blamed him. He's just a kid, and it's not like being an internet moderator was his chosen profession. He's a musician, like me, and if anybody can understand how badly and innocently a musician can fuck things up, it's me. Dangorironhide e-mailed me the instant it happened, and had the decency and respect to explain everything to me and apologize. That meant a lot to me then, and still does.

The thing that continues to chap my ass because it hurt so badly then (and still does), is that NO ONE else from Listverse managed to send as much as one syllable to me. I didn't get any kind of explanation, apology, remorse, or even a "fuck you, good riddance" from anyone at Listverse (other than dangorironhide's initial contact). There should have been something. Jamie, Cyn, Trigun, Mom, or the newly annointed astraya should have at least said SOMETHING. But all I got was silence. And that hurt worse than anything else. The Listverse forums look ridiculous with so many threads created by me, but now without any of my words in them. People's posts seem to respond to thin air. It's weird-looking, but I guess that's exactly what they wanted. Don't you think if they really did feel any remorse at all for such a gigantic boo-fu, they would have said something?

I can only surmise that it turned out the way they wanted. But six months later, it still hurts.

I'm not reviving this blog as a platform for a campaign against Listverse. I'm not reviving this blog in an attempt to recapture dead magic. I'm not even reviving this blog with the intent of anybody reading it (which I don't expect to happen).

I'm reviving it for me.

I need to write, and I'm too lazy to start a new completely brand new blog.

so this is me...writing again. In Alabama. During football season. Lord help us.